Piranha (2010)

Director: Alexandre Aja
Starring: Elisabeth Shue, Steven R. McQueen, Jessica Szohr, Adam Scott, Jerry O'Connell, Ving Rhames, , Christopher Lloyd, Richard Dreyfuss, Kelly Brook
Running Time: 90 min.
Rating: R

★★★ (out of ★★★★)

Despite seeing Piranha 3D in 2D, I'd say just the combination of Elisabeth Shue, Christopher Lloyd and killer piranhas on Spring Break still guaranteed at least a reasonably good time regardless of the format. And that's pretty much what we get. Director Alexandre Aja's remake of Roger Corman's 1978 cult classic Piranha is a throwback to the the 70's and 80's when low-budget exploitation horror movies were actually allowed to have a sense of humor and revel in their own awfulness, knowing how to have fun and let the audience in on it too. Any complaints this movie was shoddily converted to 3D post-production and the technology being misused for bargain basement horror-comedy would be missing the point. This is exactly the kind of flick that would be shown in crappy 3D at the dingiest drive-in in summer 1985 so it almost seems appropriate it be released in that same format today. While watching I could imagine well enough how those 3D scenes would have played (even if in some cases I didn't want to), but as it stands, this is fun, mindless entertainment that accomplishes what's needed.

It's Spring Break at Lake Victoria, which means 18-year-old Jake (Steven R. McQueen) is once again asked by his mom, Sheriff Julie Forrester (Elisabeth Shue), to watch his little sister and brother while everyone else has the time of their lives, including longtime crush, Kelly (Jessica Szohr). But the arrival of adult filmmaker Derrick Jones (Jerry O' Connell) provides him the opportunity to hit the seas with Kelly while serving as "location scout" for Derrick's latest Wild Wild Girls video starring actresses Danni (Kelly Brook) and Crystal (Riley Steele), and any other scantily clad and/or topless women  available. Meanwhile Julie and Deputy Fallon (Ving Rhames), investigate a mysterious death linked to a school of mutant piranhas that emerged from the floor of the lake. With help from seismologist Novak (Adam Scott) and the town's eccentric marine biologist (Christopher Lloyd), they have to contain the piranhas before they feast on all the partying co-eds.

The 3D release was clearly a profit-driven decision (as it always is), but Piranha seemed to come under fire from many who saw it theatrically for its poor post-production conversion to the format. It could be a blessing in disguise that I skipped it in theaters and can only comment on the decision to do that, rather than its results. This is a cheesy, low-budget schlock fest so the laughable special effects would have probably looked even worse and less clear on the big screen. But again, that's beside the point because you see a movie like this for a good time and it definitely delivers in that respect. It takes a little while to get going but once it does it really gets going, culminating in a relentlessly brutal 15-minute sequence of graphic, blood-soaked mayhem when the hungry piranhas finally strike on unsuspecting tourists. This is a departure from most recent horror outings in that it actually has a sense of humor that reminded me more of the 80's Friday the 13th entries. Those were awful but loads of fun, as is this. The lost art of excessively pointless nudity is resurrected by Aja, who stages a display of girl-on-girl underwater action set to classical music, maybe in an attempt to make up for the projectile vomiting and flying limbs.

The most thrilling part of the movie just might be the inspired casting, most specifically the involvement of certain actors who still would have fit right in if this came out a couple of decades earlier. It's no surprise that Elisabeth Shue seems completely in her element, tough and believable, as the kick-ass sheriff and overprotective mom. Just seeing the criminally underrated Shue given the opportunity to carry something like this again made the movie for me and she doesn't disappoint, stepping up to deliver in a role much more physically demanding than you'd imagine. The only time the movie seems to suffer slightly is when she isn't on screen, making me wonder if it would have been a better idea to focus primarily on her rather than everyone else, who are fine, just not nearly as interesting. As Jake, Steven R. McQueen (yep, it's his grandson) starts the film as the traditional wimpy kid who evolves into a hero through the experience and sells it well while Gossip Girl's Jessica Szohr becomes the third cast member of that series to have a successful big screen showing in 2010, naturally charismatic and likable as the perfect girl-next-door. Somehow Jerry O' Connell finds a way to actually overplay a sleazy porn producer who's not so loosely based on Girls Gone Wild creator Joe Francis. That even he would probably tell O'Connell to tone it down should give you an idea just how over-the-top he goes but I can't say it doesn't fit the material, as grating as he sometimes is. We know that character will eventually get his, and when he does, that punishment ends up disgustingly fitting the crime. And if that's not enough we get a Back To The Future reunion of sorts as Christopher Lloyd joins Shue, essentially plays a variation on Doc Brown while Richard Dreyfuss briefly reprises his legendary Jaws character in a memorable cameo. Eli Roth also appears as the judge of a wet t-Shirt contest and you could probably guess what happens to him.

You probably have to go back to 1997's ridiculously entertaining Anaconda to find a horror movie as fully aware of just how dumb and cheesy it is, so that alone is worth high praise. It's one of those rare guilty pleasures you don't feel the slightest bit guilty about since the phrase "It Is What It Is" couldn't possibly be more applicable than here. The piranhas do need to be bigger and more menacing, so it's a relief when the film implies its forthcoming sequel, cleverly titled Piranha 3DD, will do something about that and has the potential to be even crazier than this. Having not seen the 1978 original, I can't say how this stacks up against it, but we desperately need more fun, campy garbage like this as opposed to the dreary horror films we're currently getting. Even without the supposed benefit of 3D and viewed at home in the dead of winter, Piranha's dedication in going back to basics proves to be a welcome relief.

W.

Director: Oliver Stone
Starring: Josh Brolin, Elizabeth Banks, Jams Cromwell, Ellen Burstyn, Richard Dreyfuss, Toby Jones, Jeffrey Wright, Thandie Newton, Scott Glenn
Running Time: 129 min.
Rating: PG-13

***1/2 (out of ****)

In a lot of ways I fit the profile of the type of moviegoer Oliver Stone is reaching out to with W. Someone who definitely agrees George W. Bush didn’t do a good job as President yet doesn't necessarily have a burning desire to see him dragged through the mud. He was bad at his job and that’s it. A lot of people are bad at their jobs, but unfortunately it just so happens his job description reads: “Leader of the Free World.”

It’s possible for someone to enter a situation with the best possible intentions, only to find themselves in way over their head. Recently, I was talking to someone about the upcoming election and mentioned that Bush must be counting down the days until he’s a free man so he can go home to Texas to get some rest. That didn’t go over so well. Just that I even implied Bush was trying to do his job to the best of his abilities was blasphemous. As if he’s been sitting in the Oval Office for 8 years thinking of ways to wreck our country.

People can say what they want about Bush (and likely have) but I never thought there was a phony bone in his body. This isn’t Nixon. He’s not a crook or a liar. Instead, this is someone who shoots straight and will go to whatever lengths necessary to carry out what he believes in, even if it’s wrong. But in his mind he’s never wrong, especially when surrounded by people whose primary job it is to agree with everything he says. W. may be a fair portrayal of the man but despite what you’ve heard it isn’t necessarily a sympathetic one. That it’s actually been considered such should tell you all you need to know about how poorly the public perceives him. But it is just about as flattering a portrait as he could have possibly received and you could argue he’s just lucky to have a film based on his life with this much depth at all.
Stone paints him as an underachiever, full of self-doubt and burdened by expectations. In doing that he sets the stage for the film’s most frightening realization: He’s just like us. And whether we want to admit it or not, there’s no guarantee we could have done a better job in the White House under the circumstances. But more importantly, in being the first biopic centered around a current sitting President’s legacy, we’re robbed of time, distance and historical context in examining the film, making for some fascinating results. Not having that context may affect how we view the film right now, but strangely it doesn’t seem to have any impact on how Stone made it. Is it too soon? Probably, but that doesn’t make it any less memorable.

Stone presents Bush (Josh Brolin) as living a life defined by a failure to earn his father George Senior’s (James Cromwell’s) love and respect, something that was always exclusively reserved for his younger brother Jeb. The film follows a non-linear structure, flashing back to Bush’s younger days at Yale as a drunk womanizer who couldn’t hold a job and occasionally had to be bailed out of jail. He meets his future wife Laura (Elizabeth Banks), runs for Governor of Texas and helps dad with his 1988 Presidential campaign. There’s little shown of Bush’s days as owner of the Texas Rangers baseball franchise, though that’s more than made up for with a very inventive framing device. He never really got his act together until the age of 40 when he quit drinking and found God. That faith would beckon him to seek the country’s highest office and guide much of his future decision-making. The flashbacks are interspersed with scenes of the Bush Presidency post-9/11. This is the portion that will have everyone talking.

Of course the real thrill here is seeing a diverse and talented group of actors flesh out current political figures whose personalities have just only been touched upon in the media. Each of them plays a pivotal role in Bush’s life and career and, as expected, some performances work better than others. Toby Jones’ Karl Rove is a coach to Bush with Stone insinuating that as clueless as Bush is with Rove's guidance he’d be even more clueless without it. Jones’ take on the character is interesting as he plays him as a know-it-all creepily lurking in the shadows waiting to impress everyone with his answers.

Richard Dreyfuss wisely doesn’t go for a full-on impersonation of Dick Cheney and instead inhabits him. But if we were giving points for how well he gets the mannerisms down he’d score high marks there also. It’s scary, but not as scary as Thandie Newton’s transformation into Condoleezza Rice, which is either brilliant or terrible depending on your perspective.You could argue all day and night whether Newton’s dead-on mimicry is even appropriate for this kind of film but there’s no denying she nailed it to the point where the real Condi wouldn't be able to tell the difference. She’s basically portrayed as a suck-up to the President.

Jeffrey Wright’s Colin Powell is the sole “the voice of reason” clashing often and memorably with Dreyfuss’ Cheney, particularly in one electrifying “War Room” scene. Bruce McGill, Rob Corrdry, and Noah Wyle have much smaller roles as George Tenet, Ari Fleischer and Don Evans respectively, popping in and out when the picture requires. What’s interesting is that the film presents those working for Bush as being just as underwhelming as he is, if not moreso (that’s particularly true of Scott Glenn’s Donald Rumsfeld). With all the clashing personalities, egos and agendas, Bush never really stood a chance.

The worst thing that could have happened to the younger Bush was his father being elected President because that set the bar even higher for him. He carried that resentment all the way to The White House and Stone surmises that he went into Iraq at least partially to prove that he could finish the job his father couldn’t. Cromwell’s performance is miraculous in that he never attempts to capture George Senior’s mannerisms or any of his physical characteristics, but instead focuses his efforts on conveying the elder President’s deep disappointment as honest and reasonably as possible.

We see how the elder Bush would feel let down by his screw-up son, but at the same time we see that he unintentionally helped cause the whole mess. His inability to communicate with him on the most basic level plagued them both, right up to and throughout his term in office. When the going got too tough in his son’s administration he couldn’t even bring himself to offer any advice, much to his wife Barbara’s (Ellen Burstyn) dismay. Ironically, W. always had something his dad lacked. Not ambition, but a fire in his belly and an obsessive desire to prove everyone wrong. It ended up taking him further than anyone expected, but also helped destroy him.

What shocked me most and I didn’t expect going in was how in control of the material Stone was. I expected the tone to be all over the map and if you’ve seen any of the trailers and commercials you wouldn’t be wrong to expect the film to be a political satire. While it definitely has its subtle moments of humor, Stone plays it remarkably straight. That these were the people making decisions of that magnitude and that’s what they said while making them is scary not funny. Cheney embodies it as Dreyfuss is given the best line of the film, laying out the timetable for when U.S. troops should get out of Iraq. What he says will send chills down your spine. There’s a scene of Bush choking on a pretzel at Camp David that on paper should be hilarious, but Stone makes terrifying. No giggles. You could hear a pin drop. It’ll be a while before you can eat pretzels again.

Last year I may have had some issues with the overpraised No Country For Old Men, but Josh Brolin definitely wasn't one of them. Here he delivers a career high performance that starts as great imitation but evolves into much more as the film slowly evolves with it. The more notes he’s asked to hit the more he starts to resemble Bush in both appearance and in spirit, to the point where midway through you realize it’s a full immersion. His work never comes off as parody, a huge feat considering the subject he was asked to portray.

I didn’t think the present-day scenes worked as well as the flashbacks to his early life mainly because they’re almost too uncomfortably “of the moment,” but I could be bias since I enjoyed watching the dynamics of Bush’s younger days so much. The last hour drags its feet a little bit and spins its wheels in hammering home the message that there were no Weapons of Mass Destruction. Dumb mistakes were made. That goes without saying. Like most of Stone’s film’s, its also messy but not to the point where I feel we were seriously shortchanged on anything so he could rush it into release before the election.

With all the jumping back and forth we're missing a full-fledged emotional connection with the man, although that’s almost fitting. Nor do we really form a full one with Laura, just about the only aspect to Bush everyone agrees they like. In just a few early scenes Banks shows us why, encapsulating everything we suspected she was. What she saw in him we'll never know. The term “Better Half” couldn't be more applicable. It’s a bit of a let down she doesn’t play a bigger role, but inevitable she’d have to take a backseat given the direction of the story. This isn’t Walk The Line.
W. is a return to form of sorts for Oliver Stone who took the easy way out with 2006’s World Trade Center. It wasn’t a bad film, but played with the resonance of a Hallmark greeting card next to something as powerful as Paul Greengrass' United 93, which was released the same year. There are elements in this that characterize Stone's best work like JFK and Nixon where he’s focusing on doing what he does best: pushing our buttons. This film isn’t going to change anyone’s mind about George W. Bush and I don’t think Stone intended it to. Whether you like the man or not you can't deny it's far better to attempt to understand him than angrily make ridiculous films like Rendition, Redacted, Lions For Lambs, In The Valley of Ellah, Stop-Loss or whatever other political garbage Hollywood feels like feeding us this week. That doesn’t accomplish anything. This does.

In the long run I don’t think it matters whether this was released now or 10 years from now because this almost feels like it was made in the future and time will likely treat it well. Those who went in expecting a train wreck won’t exactly be disappointed and neither will those who expected a serious examination of Bush’s psyche. On one level it’s a standard biopic, yet on another it isn’t at all. Everyone wins. But more importantly it gets us to feel something for him. I’m not sure if it can be categorized as pity, sympathy, understanding or even any of those but it at least it’s something other than hatred.

History will judge the 43rd President, not Stone. It would be nice to think that Bush now has time to contemplate the mistakes he’s made but if there’s only one thing to take out of this film it’s that he doesn’t think he made any. In his mind he did what he felt was right for the country, acting with unwavering, stubborn consistency the entire time. Whether we needed W. to be released right now is debatable but what isn’t is that you’ll have plenty to think about when it’s over.

Poseidon

Director: Wolfgang Petersen
Starring: Kurt Russell, Josh Lucas, Richard Dreyfuss, Jacinda Barrett, Emmy Rossum
Running Time: 99 min.
Rating: PG-13

*** (out of ****)

When it was announced they'd be remaking 1972's The Poseidon Adventure I actually didn't think it was the worst possible idea in the world. While the original was campy, memorable fun it was far from a masterpiece. In fact, part of me wonders if the only reason we're so protective of the film is just because it evokes a goofy feeling of 70's nostalgia. The clothes, the unintentionally hilarious soundtrack, the performances. Ah yes, who can forget the performances? Shelly Winters as the rotund former swimming champion who sacrafices her life and Gene Hackman screaming at God as he plunges into a watery inferno. Let's not forget Ernest Borgnine overacting in, well, just about every scene. It was fun, but anyone who thinks it represents a pinnacle in filmmaking has some explaining to do. But since it was the original disaster movie it's no surprise everyone holds it dear to their hearts. However, I was curious what advanced special effects and a new vision of the story would look like.

My hopes were raised when I heard Wolfgang Petersen was directing the remake since he has experience with water-logged action films such as Das Boot and The Perfect Storm. If anyone was the man for the job it was him. This may not be as fun as the original, but it at least has it beat technically. This is a remake to its core and exactly how you'd expect The Poseidon Adventure to look and feel like if it was made in 2006. Poseidon does exactly what it sets out to do. It's a disaster movie and that's all it needs to be. Nothing more, nothing less.

The film wisely scraps all of the characters from the original film and creates new ones. Not as if it matters in a movie like this since the characters are only there to be involved in gargantuan action scenes. This time there's gambling addict Dylan Johns (Lucas), former fire chief and Mayor of New York, Robert Ramsey (Russell), his daughter Jennifer (Rossum) with boyfriend Christian (Mike Vogel) and a single mother (Barrett) and her son (Jimmy Bennett) . Plus we have stowaway, Elena (Mia Maestro) and suicidal gay architect Richard Nelson (Richard Dreyfuss) who's about to jump ship because his partner left him. The fact that Dreyfuss' character is gay is completely superfulous to the story as if they had to find some character trait to stick on him. To his credit, he makes the most of his part and looks like he's having alot of fun. I've never met a gay architect but I bet if I did he'd act something like Dreyfuss does here. He even gets to to deliver the movie's most unintentionally ridiculous line stating "I'm an architect and these ships aren't designed to stay afloat upside down." You learn something new every day.
The rest of the passengers on the ship? They all die when a "rogue wave" hits and they make the unfortunate mistake of listening to the captain (Andre Braugher) and staying in the ballroom instead of following the others to the top (bottom) of the ship. On the plus side, Fergie of the Black Eyed Peas bites the dust.

Amazingly this movie is off and running within the first fifteen minutes, a far cry from the original. In fact it moves at such a break neck pace you almost wish it would stop for air at times. Where the original film was funny and adventurous, this one is tension-filled. Although it's hard to take a film too seriously that features a villainous character named "Lucky Larry." Think he survives past the twenty minute mark? Still, there are some genuinely suspenseful scenes such as a trip through an air vent that's way too close for comfort and one of the most realistic drowning scenes I've ever seen. I never cared much for the ending of The Poseidon Adventure, because I felt it didn't really end. It just stopped. The ending here is only slightly better, but this type of film isn't going to be remembered for it's narrative stylings so it isn't a major issue.

Like the original, there's a huge death scene involving a major character, which I thought was actually better executed in this film. Not to give anything away, this person had more at stake and, as a result, made a greater sacrifice, deepening the impact of the death. I appreciated the effort (however small) that went into establishing the relationships between the characters, especially Ramsey's overprotectiveness of his daughter and his disapproval of her relationship with the boyfriend. It's a stock storyline, but it was played well by all parties involved. I also liked that there were two leaders (Lucas and Russell) this time around instead of just one (Hackman) in the original. It created a new, interesting dynamic for the story seeing two strong-willed personalities attempt to work together.

A movie like this isn't going to be strong on character development and it isn't, but anyone who thinks the original did a much better job at it is fooling themselves. The acting is fine all around but if I had one complaint it would be that it almost moved too quickly and could have used ten more minutes at the beginning or end. If you loved the original, this remake will do nothing to taint or disgrace your memory of it. They can stand side by side as a different take on a similar story. If you go into Poseidon approaching it for what it is, you definitely won't be disappointed.